Genius Camp
by Dream-and-believe
Summary: The Bleach cast gets sent to Genius Camp, an academic camp specially tailored for geniuses. There both sides teach and assist classes and supervise students. Genius and insanity level pumped to the max. Some relationships, don't like, I don't care.
1. Say What?

Genius Camp

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, Summer camp, or anything else…I'm just a nobody. cries Insane OOCness and OCness follow this line, there will be relationships, don't like, bite me.

* * *

"What?!" Grimmjow yelled, earning him a glare and a "shut up trash" from Ulquiorra. Of course, Grimmjow's reaction wasn't entirely unfounded… "WHY WOULD WE WANT TO BABYSIT A BUNCH OF KIDS?!"

"We aren't 'babysitting kids' as you call it…merely observing possible threats." Aizen replied in is normal coolheaded manner, "Naw naw Aizen, why are yah worried bout a bunch o preteens? It ain't like they got reiatsu or anythin'." Aizen smiled at his right hand man's observation, "No, but this group of children consists of geniuses in all fields, and that could be a problem if they are left alone."

"A problem? How is that Aizen-sama?" This response earned a "goody-two-shoes" from Nnoitra and Grimmjow, almost simultaneously. "Hmm, well, it's partially the children, and partially the fact that seireitei has sent in people as well." All of the espada reacted to that-except Ulquiorra, but he has problems.

You could have heard a pin drop in the meeting room, then Gin suddenly broke the silence-surprise surprise- "So, what're we waiting for?"

Stark, "zzzz"

Halibel: "…"

Barragen: "Bah."

Ulquiorra: emotionless statue

Nnoitra: mutter"There better not be any girls there."/mutter

Grimmjow: mutter "Ichigo better be there."/mutter (upcoming fight hmm?)

Zomari: "…why do I feel like I'm going to be the first to die?"

Szayel: evil scientist laugh (wtf? Oo)

Aaroniero: "…better not be in a sunny state…"

Aizen: "It's in California"

Yammy: "Haha. Sucks for you tubey."

Aeroniero: "Do you want to die?"

Gin: "Wtf man?"

Tosen: Ichimaru, what happened to your accent?"

Gin: "…" shifty eyes.

* * *

It's short. Bite me. This is an experiment. I apologize for the texting style near the end, bite me. I'm resistant to flames. So don't waste your time.


	2. The Name Game

Yays, chapter two! (only one excited) And I changed the rating to T, cleaning up Grimmjow's language for long periods of time is…too hard.

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, bite me. I swear that's the last time I'll say that.

* * *

Rangiku grumbled and downed the last of her sake, "God, kids are so noisy, why can't they all be like Hitsugaya-taichou?" Rangiku gasped as she realized what she had just said, and then groaned again as **another** one of the kids she was **supposed** to be watching stumbled through the door, "Umm…" The girl ducked her head out of the door, read the name card on the door, then ducked back in, "Rangiku, it's time for the initiation ceremony."

"What?! Well why didn't you tell me sooner?" She then proceeded to tip over, defying physics and landing on her bunk bed across the room, "Damn," The girl cursed under her breath, "Guess we aren't going…" With this she returned to her room, put on a long sleeve shirt that said "I do all my own stunts" Written across the front, and went into the hallway where the rest of the girls were.

"We aren't going…" The children groaned, then a smaller girl with a grin on her face said, "**Let's play the name game!"**

" But we know everyone's names are" Replied the tallest girl in the group, "OH YEAH!?" The short one shot back, "Then what's my name?"

"Elyssa." The tall one replied confidently, "THEN WHAT"S HER NAME?" Elyssa yelled, pointing at the girl with the "I do all my own stunts" t-shirt (who was also wearing a cowboy hat, suspicious, dun dun dun…) , "Her name is Lahna, but she prefers to be called Fury." This continued until Elyssa ran out of group members. (The RA group had 10 people in it. And most of them didn't seem to mind the exchange.)

"WHAT'S JOHN LENNON'S BIRTHDAY?"

"October 9th" The tall girl crossed her arms.

"THE SQUARE ROOT OF 9922284?"

"3 149.96571" The tall girl replied mechanically.

"Wtf?" (shorty)

"You knew that." (tall girl)

"Yeah…but it's still creepy to meet other people who can do that." (guess who)

"Yeah…"

"So, what's the weather for tomorrow?"

"Misty in the morning, then sunny the rest of the day, why?"

"OMG ARE YOU PHYCIC?!"

"This is California, that's the weather **every day**."

"Touche, so what's your name."

"Terry."

"Cool name."

"Can we rejoin the conversation?" An emo looking girl named Anna shot in. "Sure, why not." Elyssa replied.

Now, right down the hall, Halibel sat in her room, cursing, "God, these human brats, and now shinigami? Does Aizen want us ALL to become as emo as Ulquiorra?" (sorry, had to do it.) She sat behind the door during the entire initiation ceremony as her charges pounded on the door, then continued to ignore them all through dinner. ALL of the espada, Gin and Tousen did this, most because they figured out they couldn't alert the shinigami of their presence yet, Grimmjow because he forgot, Nnoitra because he killed one of his kids and had to hide the body, Aaroniero because one of his students, thinking he was a fish bowl (since his gigai which looks like Kaien was still in his suitcase for some reason), dumped tranquilizer into his head, causing him to fall asleep, and Tousen because Gin misread the schedule to him and he tried to take his kids to a parade instead, needless to say, he ended up in LA, where a bunch of gangsters beat him senseless as his children watched and laughed (he thought a float ran him over.)

* * *

More Tousen bashing ahead, because I DON'T LIKE THAT MORALLY BLIND, HYPOCRITICAL, PACIFISTIC LITTLE IDIOT. Thankyouverymuch for reading, if you even read it. If you didn't Nnoitra will come and step on you.


	3. Of Orientation and a Pissed off Kensei

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, I don't even think I still have any cleaner left…I really need to visit Safeway

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Site director Tim sighed and looked at the empty room before him, none of the RA's had shown up, and if that wasn't bad enough, Dean of Academic Life Yamamoto had fallen asleep in his chair and the snoring was drowning out Tim's I pod. All of a sudden a kid burst in screaming. Loudly. Now, Tim was a patient man, but he wasn't THAT patient. "SHUT THE HELL UP YOU LITTLE BRAT!!"  
"But, but, but…a kid's on fire!"

"Oh, well, shit, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"…I was at the bookstore getting candy."

"Well, that's understandable."

"Huh what?" Shunsui, who was now teaching a physics class, sat up in his seat, "Who on fire?" This was said with sarcasm, but it was all the opening the child needed, "It's, it's Quinn, he's on fire by the dorms." Dean of student health Ukitake (wtf man) blinked, "Should we go help him?"

"Nah, he's probably dead now." Time waved it off, "Anyways, since no one showed up, why don't we go."

"But but, our RA, Nnoitra, said he would be right back?"

"THE HELL?!" Shunsui yelled, that name was familiar, 'oh well,' he thought, going back to sleep.

"STOP SWEARING." Tim was pissed now, a kid was dead, his I pod couldn't drown out the students, and no one came to his orientation, "BUT YOU WERE SWEARING JUST NOW!"

"Good point, disregard that rule." With that, Tim the Site Director left the room, praying this wouldn't be his last summer at genius camp.

* * *

Kensei was pissed, first, Shinji just randomly announces ALL the vizards are going to California to teach at a summer camp, then he learns that Tousen is an RA down the hall from him, and to top it all off, he has to take twelve preteens to dinner in an organized fashion, through the girls dorm, without killing any of them, and then put up with them for THREE MORE WEEKS.

"KENSEI!!"

"Damnit Mashiro, you can't leave me alone for FIVE MINUTES?"

"But…but…but…"

"SHUT UP, I DIDN'T GET ANY SLEEP ON THE WAY HERE, AND THESE KIDS WON'T BE QUIET FOR ALL OF FIVE MINUTES WHILE I TAKE THEM TO DINNER."

"But…but…my RA won't take us to dinner."

"So?" With this, Halibel's ENITIRE GROUP popped out from behind Mashiro and began to socialize with the boys. "You're taking us to dinner Kensei."

"Damnit."

* * *

We will be seeing a lot of Tim the Site Director in the future, so be prepared.


	4. And That would Really Suck

Remember the relationships thing? Well it's starting, and the wheel lands on… GinRan!

(What, I like that pairing.)

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, if I did, it would suck…badly.

* * *

"I'm hungry Gin." Austin complained for the fiftieth time, "We have to go to breakfast."

"No we don't." Gin replied, screwing with these humans was a lot of fun, and besides, Aizen, wannabe god, prophet, devil, AND dictator had told him that he couldn't show himself until the beginning of class. 'Rangiku is going to be THERE too, that's the problem.' An uncharacteristic frown crossed the former captain's face as he thought this, god he missed her.

"But…I'M HUNGRY!!" Austin interrupted Gin's thoughts with an outburst, "I d t dun care." The kid was pouting now, 'oh great…' Ichimaru sighed, "Will ya be happy if we go ta the café?"

"Are we gonna go there EVERY DAY? I don't have that much money."

"Nah, just today." Gin stood up from where he was seated and his grin FINALLY appeared on his face, "NICE." Austin ran out of Gin's room and into another boy, Teddy, "Sorry."

"Nerd." The other boy, who had brown and blonde hair and a serious attitude problem muttered as he scanned Austin's bulky frame and glasses.

"That's Noreek to you." Austin crossed his arms, "A nerd, a dork, and a geek."

"…Umm…okay then, I'm just gonna get my money now."

"How did you know we were going to the café?" Austin stared at Teddy expectantly, "I didn't, I was hiring a hit man to kill you."

"HOLY SHIT REALLY?"

"No you idiot, I was eavesdropping…god…"

"…"

"…"

"Well, umm, let's just go tell everyone we get to eat today."

"…yeah, that's a good idea."

Ichimaru Gin was a traitor…to everyone…well, at least everyone he cared about, and that was a select group of people. There was Aizen of course, and while Gin had never really BETRAYED Aizen before, he wasn't exactly the most loyal soldier, from re-arranging the passages of Los Noches to confuse arrancar to that little apology he gave to Ran. (Which he was scolded for later, and he acted like a whipped puppy of course, that was his job.)

Then, there was Kira, he hated to admit it, but he was fond of the guy…not relationship fond of course, but he made it just a little bit harder to leave Seireitei…he wondered how Izuru was doing sometimes… probably hurt the kid a bit when he left…and that sucked even more. But what was the worst betrayal of all? When he left Ran-chan of course. And I don't mean all those times he left when they were kids, that was just fine, he always came back after that…so it couldn't have hurt her too much…he hoped…

That's right, Ichimaru Gin HOPED he hadn't hurt someone…but then again, Ran-chan wasn't a normal person to him. She was so much more…he loved her…he didn't know if she loved him back…he actually hoped she didn't, he didn't want her to hurt like that. It may sound sappy and out of his character…but Gin wasn't as evil as everyone thought he was…in fact, he almost wasn't evil at all…just a big bastard…he wasn't even as evil as Zaraki…admit it…if he didn't have that creepy voice…or smile the way he did…or follow Aizen…you would think Ichimaru Gin was a funny dude. Cruel…but funny.

He didn't even use to smile like this…it used to be a real smile…he used to be one happy guy...back when he wasn't a bastard…just a jerk…he missed those days, when he didn't have to worry about Ran-chan finding out how bad a guy he was…or Aizen finding out he had doubts…that would have been the worst occurrence ever…'cuz then of course he'd have to kill Ran-chan to prove he wasn't…or he would die…and he didn't want either of those things…so after he stopped smiling for real, he kept smiling…just to pretend, so Ran-chan didn't suspect anything, and so Aizen couldn't figure out what he was thinking by looking into his goddamn eyes…of course, for all he knew, Aizen, with his complete illusion zanpacktou, knew everything and was just screwing with him…he hoped not…because then he'd have to kill her.

And that would suck.

* * *

Don't worry, Gin won't contemplate much in this story…just had to do that…because it's one of the few pairings I don't see and go, "This is crack on crack on crack."


	5. Breakfast, death threats, then:TRADEOFF!

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, if I did…well…it would suck.

* * *

"KENSEI I'M HUNGRY!!" Kensei closed his eyes irritably and groaned, "That's why we're in line for breakfast goddammit…wait for five minutes."

"BUT KENSEI!!"

"Shut…up…or…go somewhere…else…" Kensei moved to the front of the food line, got his food, and waited for his kids to sit down, 'God…what did I do to deserve this…preteen guys AND girls' He thought for a minute before adding, '…AND Mashiro…which is even worse, I was hoping to get her off my back for a few weeks…'

He mentally blocked out the children's conversations by repeating "mind over matter, mind over matter…" Under his breath, this was supposed to be summer, why were all these kids going to school? He didn't get it at all…most of the captains goofed off during the summer, and they had responsibilities. He remembered the other captains skipping paperwork in favor of a drinking party…then again they did that all year round, not just in summer…

"KENSEI I'M DONE!! CAN WE GO SOMEWHERE ELSE!?" Kensei groaned once again, why did HIS lieutenant have to speak in all caps? He couldn't have gotten a more normal lieutenant like Hachi, Lisa, hell, even Hiyori. He contemplated that for a second, then cut Hiyori out of the list…that would end badly…

Ending this thought, the former captain stood up and lead the group of his AND some other lazy RA's kid's outside and to the place where he would (thankfully) hand them off to their TA's. As he did this he mentally cursed Tousen, Aizen, and Ichimaru for making this happen…but mostly Tousen.

"ICHIMARU I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!" Ichimaru Gin raised an eyebrow at one of his group members, the infamous prodigy, Hitsugaya Toushiro. "Nah nah shorty, it ain't good ta threaten yer elders, specially when they're gonna be in charge o' your livin fer the next, oh, three weeks or so." He held out an arm, stopping Hitsugaya's rush with his palm (lol, I've always wanted to have someone do that) and chuckling to himself, he then grabbed Hitsugaya's shoulder and whispered in his ear, "Nah nah, yer scarin' the other kiddies, best not alarm them any more." (don't any Hitsugaya fans go, HE COULD COUNTER, it's cuz they're in gigai, and Gin is like…bigger, so his gigai would probably be stronger.'

"I'll kill you later…" Hitsugaya stated quietly, trembling in rage, then a surprised expression crossed his face as he saw Gin's uncharacteristic sad expression, "I'm countin' on it." Gin's normal expression soon reappeared on his face, "Nah kiddies, what Toushiro just showed us is an example of what NOT ta do ta yer counselors…shall we git goin? I think I'm scarin the café folks." Ichimaru stood up and exited the café calmly, his kids following nervously, avoiding him and Hitsugaya, who was looking VERY pissed that Gin had used his first name.

* * *

"Rangiku? Do you have a boyfriend?" A girl named Angela said nervously, blushing slightly, "Hmm, why do you ask?" Rangiku was surprised by this question, these girls were all twelve or thirteen, this shouldn't be a talk they're having right now, humans are so strange. "Well…umm…there's this boy that I like, and he's at this camp…so…" Rangiku urged the girl to continue, "And"

"Well, I was wondering…if you could give me some advice…on how to get him to like me…"

"I'm glad you asked!! The first thing boys like is big boobs, but your young so you don't have to worry about that…the best way to act around a boy you like is to be bold and not be ashamed you like them, but don't approach him at first, get to know him, then when your sure he knows who your are, make your move!" Rangiku laughed, she was worried they were going to ask her who HER boyfriend was…and she didn't quite know how to answer that…

And that was when they got to the courtyard, Rangiku's jaw dropped, Grimmjow was massaging his temples in a far corner, Ulquiorra was looking TRULY depressed next to him, Nnoitra's eyes shifted from left to right, and the deceased lieutenant Kaien (aka Aaroniero) was looking groggy. This was just one small part next to the fountain, and that wasn't what caught her eye, no, what caught her eye was…him…'why the hell is Gin here? Dammit, I'm confused.' Gin on the other hand, was busy holding a still angry Hitsugaya off while Kira gaped on the sidelines and Momo sat with her group, looking nervous…oh boy…this is gonna be a fun three weeks.


	6. Thoughts Made in Pain and Annoyance

Okay People, finally, it's chapter six no one claps …fine, be that way… T.T

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach…but you all knew that, didn't you?

* * *

Momo stared forward wide eye, "Ai-Aizen-t-taichou…" The former taichou ignored her, and the girl fainted, in typical co-dependant fashion. "I WILL KILL YOU AAAAAAIIIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNN!!" Aizen ignored the approach of the girls white haired friend, instead writing on the whiteboard, "AIZEN" In all capital letter. "Now children, my name is Aizen, and I will be your teacher in…" Aizen looked down at his assignment letter, "Inductive and deductive reasoning…oh joy…"

"HEY AIZEN, HEY AIZEN!?" A brown haired boy waved his hand back and forth, yelling at a pitch usually reserved for five year olds on cocaine, and even Aizen twitched, partially because his ears hurt, partially because he didn't like the children addressing him without a Sama, oh well, it could be forgiven, they would soon learn.

"Yes?" Aizen looked at his TA, an absentminded blonde who was chewing gum happily, ignoring the rule that said not too.

"WHY ARE ALL THE STAFF HERE ASIAN!?" The child sitting in front of the boy, a black haired kid who looked kind of like a kid Ulquiorra, to Aizen's dismay, clapped his hands over his ears and ducked, barely dodging a wad of spite that flew from the brunettes mouth.

"_Oh god…how does Tousen deal with a brat following him around all the time, I want to strangle them and I just got here…"_

* * *

Tousen sneezed, and would have thought it superstition, but considering that fact that his friends down in LA had finally given up and tossed him into a lake (he thought he crashed into the aquarium), he had other reasons to be sneezing.

"Damn brats, none of them are like Wonderwice…" Tousen muttered in an out of character manner, he hated children, he wondered how Gin seemed to be doing so well with them…he wanted to drown them, and it had only been one day.

* * *

Ichimaru Gin sneezed, and **he** thought it was superstition, but he couldn't exactly do anything, seeing as Matsumoto had hung him up from his socks outside the boys dorm. Thank god he was wearing normal clothes, and thank Aizen he didn't have Shinsou on him, he could imagine how that would pan out…Shinsou falling down and stabbing someone…such a pain.

"_GIN, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE YOU BASTARD!!" Rangiku stormed up to him and slapped him._

"_Aww, Ran-chan, that hurts a lot ya know." Gin rubbed the red spot on his cheek where she had hit him. "Why'd ya do that hmm? And after we been apart fer so long."_

"_YOU KNOW WHY GIN, YOU DIRTY TRAITOR!! YOU WENT AND LEFT EVERYONE GODDAMMIT, YOU EXPECT ME NOT TO BE MAD?"_

"…_Well, how can I getcha to forgive me?"_

_With that, the angry looking Fuku-taichou grabbed Ichimaru's coller and dragged him to the boys dorm, "This will be a start."_

Ichimaru sighed, how did Shunsui-taichou deal with women so well, the one he loved most had just hung him from the laundry line, and it had only been one day….

* * *

Somewhere, Shunsui-taichou sneezed, waking him up, and Nanao whacked him for falling asleep in class.


	7. VILLAINS! NO WAIS!

Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own Bleach, but if it comes up on EBay, I might.

Author's note: For the sake of avoiding repetitiveness (and to stop Hitsugaya and Matsumoto from beating on Ichimaru TOO much) I am introducing the villains of this fic:

Crystallina:

"But, but, why do WE have to be the evil people in this story?" Cries

Soma Raito:

"Because it pays better than being a shinigami."

Lucia:

"You're the only shinigami in this group Raito."

Raito:

"I'm also the only one who has a family name."

Crystal:

cries harder

Lucia

hits Raito

…hard

AND THERE ARE MORE TO COME FOLKS! Sooooo, hold on to your seats!

* * *

Ichimaru walked to the courtyard, wet and miserable. He had had the good fortune of getting down from the clothesline, but he fell and his head, and the sprinklers had to choose THAT time to come on.

"I hate sprinklers…"

"And I hate you."

"Ya wanna know why I follow Aizen, Nnoitra?" Ichimaru said, turning to face the tall arrancar. "Yeah."

"Well, its cuz all ya'll keep doin that, even when I dun do anythin."  
"Who's ya'll?"  
"Everyone who says they hate me."

"You deserve it."

" Well, NOW I do."

"What's that supposed to mean?" The thin former shinigami sighed and continued walking, leaving Nnoitra behind him, attemping to register what Gin had said with his small, sexist mind.

Ichimaru walked to the boys dorm, SOAKING wet and miserable, "I hate fountains."

"Hey, Gin?"

"What?"

"Why'd that RA dump you into the fountain."

"It's cuz, well, ya see, we had a relationship, but now it's all rocky an she hates me."

"She sounds like a bitch."

'_Since when did kids swear?'_ Ichimaru thought, entering the dorms. "Everyone get ready to go to activities."

"What activities?"

"The ones ya signed up fer yesterday."

"Oh yeah."

Ichimaru Gin cursed his luck as he walked to the dodgeball court, trying to ignore the evil glares Matsumoto was giving him… why did they sign up for this activity?

* * *

"RAITO RAITO RAITO RAITO RAITO RAITO!! RAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOO-SAAAAAAAANNNNNNN!!" A short girl yelled frantically, running towards a taller boy of about fifteen or sixteen. "What is it Crystallina?" The boy asked in a monotone voice, brushing his raven black hair from his charcoal eyes.

"WE'RE IN CALIFORNIA SO YOU NEED TO GO GET TAN BECAUSE YOU'RE SO PALE!!"

"…" The teen gazed at the small girl, with her pixie cut and thin features that made her almost look like a real fairy. They could have passed for brother and sister, if not for the fact that the girl had yell irises and the whites of her eyes were black…she had hollow eyes.

"I refuse, we have been given a mission by the master, and as such, we must complete it without fail." The boy would have been threatening, if that were possible for someone like him, for his delicate looking structure made him look more like a doll than a person.

"BUT BUT BUT…" The small girl pouted the grinned, "LUCIA LUCIA LUCIA-SAN!!" She was addressing a tall female, who ruffled the small girls dark, wood earth colored hair, "Yep, that's right, and Raito, you can go and have some fun, it's not like you're a wraith, you aren't obligated to help us in our plan."

"I am stunned you don't think I should feel obligated, I intend to help our master complete his task." Lucia sighed, the boy was so odd, then again, he was dedicated, and that made him better than most shinigami, he had even forsaken a captain's position just to join them.

* * *

A second note by the author: :o No wai, there are villains!! Tis is becoming a serious fic!! Better make em do something stupid before I have to change the category!! And get ready for a bit of Gin bashing the next chapter. I promise it twill end.


	8. Activity time!

Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. But you knew that already, didn't you?

* * *

"oof." Ichimaru Gin fell down, then stared at the banana peel at his feet, "Okay, who put this ere?"

"Not us."

"Yeah, that's too much of a cliché."

"I would have made sure you fell from a cliff."

"Thanks a lot Shiro."

"THAT'S CAPTAIN…oh wait."

"Ran-chan?"

"Not creative enough for me…and stop calling me that."

"So cruel."

* * *

Raito yawned, "Isn't that a bit of a cheap trick to pull?" The little girl standing next to him started crying, "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHH, RAITO-SAN DOESN'T LIKE MY IDEA!!"

"ow." Raito rubbed his head where Lucia had just hit him. "Well it is kind of clichéd, don't you think?"

"Shh." Lucia peered out of the bushes they were behind. "How did they not hear that?"

"Maybe they're deaf?"

"Then why are they yelling at each other?"

"I dunno."

"Ow. Why did you hit me?"

"Hey, whas that?" Gin walked up to a hedge and looked behind it, "Who're you guys?"

"Noooooooooooo one."

"I AM YOUR FATHER."

"That's stupid."

"…ow."

* * *

Kensei took a deep breath and sighed, why had he had to RA this activity? So bothersome.

"ARTS AND CRAFTS YAY!!"

"Kensei…Mashiro won't shut up."

"Told you not to give her sugar."

"Who gave Mashiro sugar?" Kensei stood up, knocking his chair over in the process, "I demand to see this idiot."

"Umm, it's me."

"Go to the dean's office."

"Why?"

"Because giving Mashiro sugar is a punishable offense, now go." Kensei pointed at the door, and the child responsible for this incident walked out, grumbling to himself.

"Hey mister. Are you a lawyer?"

"A what?"  
"A lawyer."

"No."

"You should be one."

"I'll think about it as soon as we get Mashiro to shut up…god, my eardrums feel like they're exploding…more so than usual."

* * *

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz." Stark lay on the floor, snoring happily away. At least, he was until Lillinette woke him up. "GET UP GET UP GET UP!!"

"Why should I?"

"CUZ THIS IS SOCCER AND YOU CAN'T LIE DOWN ON THE SOCCER FIELD!!"

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz." Shunsui snored away on the other side of the field; because he didn't have a fraccion to wake him up…thank god Nanao was teaching a library activity.

* * *

"Okay kids, this is how it's going to work, you see that silver haired guy on the other side?"

"You mean Gin?"

"Yep, well, you see, I went to High school with him, and he's a really good dodge ball player, so here's the plan." Matsumoto whispered to her team; this was going to be fun…

* * *

Raito hid in the bushes, for the first time in centuries, he was questioning the master's plan. _'Maybe it was a mistake?'_ But no, Raito looked back down at the paper and saw, plain as day,

"MISSION OBJECTIVE FOR WRAITHS LUCIA AND CRYSTALLINA AND SHINIGAMI ALLY SOMA RAITO:

MESS AROUND WITH THE SHINIGAMI, DON'T KILL THEM, JUST MAKE THEM LOOK LIKE IDIOTS…OH, AND DO THE SAME WITH THE ARRANCAR, AND MAYBE THAT KARIYA IDIOT, I DOUBT HE WENT DOWN SO EASILY, SO YOU BETTER FIND HIM AND MAKE HIM AND HIS BOUNTS LOOK LIKE FOOLS…

BY ISSUE OF THE GRAND MASTER, SOON TO BE OVERLORD OF EVERWHERE.

'_Well, the master is old, perhaps he is becoming senile.' _Raito shook his head to clear away these thoughts, no, he mustn't question the master…he must have some underlying cause for this.

* * *

Author's note: No waiz!! The master plan of the villains is becoming clear? And that's right; I'm bringing the bounts into this, simply because emo boy Kariya would make a good Camp counselor.


	9. Bounts

Disclaimer: Nope, still not mine.

* * *

"Okay go." The kids on both teams ran to the middle of the dodge ball court and grabbed at the dodge balls, "Okay, one, two, three, PELT HIM!!"

Ichimaru Gin stood at the back of his side, god he hated dodge ball and… "Aww shit…"

Ichimaru Gin dropped to the ground unconscious. _'Serves you right Gin…'_

* * *

Kyoraku yelped as another kid stepped on him, geez, couldn't these kids be a bit more considerate? The other RA got it, he looked like he wanted to sleep, but noooooooooooo, **they** had been the ones to draw soccer from the activity hat, what kind of name is that anyways, the "activity hat…" _'Why couldn't I have gotten the library activity with my lovely Nanao-chan?'_

* * *

Nanao looked awkwardly at her former lieutenants, after all these years of considering her a traitor, being in the same room was…uncomfortable...But, the older woman didn't think so, and went around her business, reading, showing the kids good books, and telling a hyper brunette boy (see chapter six) to get off the windowsill before it collapsed and sent him to his doom. Why was she so calm?

* * *

Meanwhile, Kensei, all alone in his activity, was cursing the site director for doing this to him, he looked at the kids, Mashiro in particular, as someone had decided it would be funny to give her coffee as well, and now she was acting like a squirrel on crack, the boy had been punished by Chikaze immediately.

* * *

Dean of health Ukitake stood in the health office, wondering exactly what he should do, he looked at a boy who was sent from the arts and crafts activity and looked like he had been hit in the face with a cero, an unhappy Stark and an even unhappier Shunsui who had both been trampled on by soccer players, an unconscious Ichimaru Gin…and his deceased lieutenant…god, today was so hard.

* * *

Somewhere Tim the site director was laughing maniacally at the predicament everyone was in; he was wondering when he would get to have some fun.

* * *

Somewhere else a dark figure was ALSO laughing maniacally, but this time the clichéd soon to be master of everything knew his plan would work, this would be hilarious.

* * *

"Okay guys, I'm pleased to introduce the additions to the staff, Kariya, Mabashi, Ugaki, Koga, Yoshi, and Maki." Tim the site director stated, the nightmarish activities had finally ended, and apparently there were some new RAs that would be teaching the 11 year olds. "HOLYSHITNOWAYIREFUSETOACKNOWLEDGETHIS!!"

"Right, arrancar are fine, but bounts, NO WAI." Kariya said unhappily.

"Racist." Ugaki muttered as Mabashi flipped off the current RA's.

"But you guys are dead."

"He does have a bit of a point." Maki said shrugging. "Yeah, well…actually…do any of you guys know how we're alive?" Kariya asked.

"Nope."

"Not really."

"Who cares?"

"I thought you knew."

"..."

"Umm, hey guys, I know for a fact that you're all alive…so what is going on here?" Tim the site director asked.

"Dunno…"

"We can't tell you."

"That's classified."

"No it isn't Mayuri-sama."

"Yes it is you insolent wench."

"Okay."

* * *

Author's note: :o no wai!! What I wonder is how no one is dead yet, I mean, you'd figure they would have killed someone by now.


End file.
